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The first cartoon I’ve drawn in ages. I still have not thrown away all of my pieces of paper…

It’s called The Primrose Path

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Primrose_Path

Trevor Beattie on what focus groups lack: “it’s called conviction, passion, creativity, innovation, disrespect for the mundane”

1999

“Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted”. Albert Einstein

“Heine identified the precise origin of the British-oligarchical way of thinking in Lockean empiricism, and utilitarianism. In the Englischen Fragmenten, he warns: “But don’t send any poets to London. This naked [mere?] seriousness about everything, this colossal monotony, this machine-like movement, this sadness of joy itself, this exaggerated London, oppresses the imagination and tears the heart. And you must certainly not send a German poet there, a dreamer, who must pause for everything he sees, even for a ragged beggar woman, or a shiny plate made by a goldsmith — Oh! He’ll have a rough time soon enough, and he will be pushed around from all sides, or with a mild “God damn” be pushed down onto the ground.”

http://members.tripod.com/american_almanac/heine.htm

Mike Chambers was walking his dog on a Norfolk beach. He found a flint axe that could be 700,000 years old.

http://www.britishmuseum.org/explore/highlights/highlight_objects/loan_in/h/handaxe.aspx

Given the choice, the bottom of a cliff with the tide coming in fast is not a place you’d work. For Paul Durbidge and Bob Mutch, however, the foreshore at Pakefield, south of Lowestoft, Suffolk, is precisely where they want to be. Especially in winter, and even more so when the storms are up. Because it’s then that the fossils are exposed.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/science/2006/jan/06/g2.archaeology

“There were actually other reasons in addition to “insufficient progress” that caused the wash-out. One was a loss of interest on my part in flying only level and in very gentle turns. But I had also developed a fear of the airplane. One evening an inspector had somehow dropped a lighted flare down through the flare chute, and it caught the fabric-covered plane on fire. In just over two minutes by the clock, the AT-17 was reduced almost to ashes. That wasn’t a pleasant thing to hear about. So those are the reasons my stay at Roswell lasted only about five weeks.”

http://www.stelzriede.com/ms/html/mshwp32.htm

Marshall Stelzriede, March 4, 1919 - January 1, 2005.

Tim Berners Lee talked about the semantic web to Tamsin Toddin - The Independent 17 May 1999.

Berners-Lee: “If the Web turns all the documents in the world into one big book, then the semantic web will turn all the databases in the world into one big database”

This allows inter-operability

Seven years on,  the BBC collaborated with Microsoft Live Labs. Photosynth  creates three- dimensional representations of some of the most dramatic buildings in Britain by combining hundreds of different photographs.

Using metadata.

http://labs.live.com/photosynth/bbc/

The story’s told that when Kirk Douglas’ son - Eric - was ‘dying’ on stage, he started to shout angrily at the audience “I’m  Kirk Douglas’  son!”.

Of course, members of the audience then started to shout back:

“No. I’m Kirk Douglas’ son!”

“No. I’m Kirk Douglas’ son!” etc

Yesterday I walked past a Tony & Guy salon. Inside, the hairdressers were having a meeting - seated together and taking notes.

This got me thinking…

Q: How many hairdressers does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: One (if the bulb just wants a Wayne Rooney shaved head style).
Or two or more - if it wants a more elaborate style, like what Tina Turner has.  

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For all you hairdresser joke fans out there, I’ve just done a quick google search and it seems that my joke is less hairdresser labour intensive than other hairdresser jokes. The usual response is:

A: Five. One to change the bulb and four to say “Marvellous Gary.”

“Everything you can imagine is real”

Pablo Picasso

Does British magician Paul Daniels have negative buoyancy? Apparently he can’t use his swimming pool, because he sinks rather than floats.

Everything is what it is when it stops.

A neat sentence, but is it true? I don’t think so.